In the Mommy Trenches

Do you ever watch Jon & Kate plus 8? If you don't know who I mean, they are a couple on TLC who had twin girls and then a couple of years later had sextuplets. They are documenting their lives on t.v. at the moment.

I am fascinated by this couple. Initially, by the nightmare that must be their life. Afterall, can you imagine having twin two year olds and then bringing home six little babies? Yet 3 years later and they are still laughing and enjoying it. What amazes me is how organized Kate is and obviously with 8 children she needs to be. Does she go completely crazy? Sometimes, but she's still amazingly in control. She inspires me because she's not a super mom, she makes mistakes. Her and her husband snip at each other and she has sworn on the odd occasion. They have all had meltdowns (adults and kids alike) and never have they made it like a hollywood life. It's real. I can relate to everything they are going through, except I have 3 not 8.

Yet, they get to do a little monolog about it afterwards. I think if everybody got to do that, you know look back and discuss why they behaved the way they did, it just might give us some insight into our mistakes, our motivations and ways to do better the next time. Of course, our husbands would go batty.

What has especially struck me by Jon and Kate is that two people can be in the middle of kiddie chaos with all that entails, which includes snapping at each other, and know that even though that happens they do love each other. That it's okay and it does happen to other people.

Somehow I always imagine other parents doing better than us. They are better at handling the endless questions, tantrums and just ooze patience all the while maintaing a perfectly tidy house. You know they are the ones that actually rotate their children's toys. So it's nice to see that there are other people out there who feels the same way that I do at times.

Kate also said something else that clicked for me. She said that it's okay that she's not the fun one. That her children see daddy as being the fun one and that's alright. She provides for pretty much everything else and that's okay. That was nice to hear because I've often felt that I had to try and be more fun and carefree like daddy on top of all the other stuff I have to do. Not that you shouldn't take time out to play with the kids sometimes but it takes off some of the pressure. Face it, we place enough expectations on ourselves as it is.

Still, you'd have to be pretty brave to put yourself out there on tv like that. If that were me, I'd be cringing because some days I just don't think I'm doing even half as good a job as Jon & Kate are doing. There are days like I feel like a big failure and other days I know I'm not doing a bad job after all.

Anyways, that's my thought for today.