; window.dataLayer = window.dataLayer || []; function gtag(){dataLayer.push(arguments);} gtag('js', new Date()); gtag('config', 'UA-6252405-9'); In the Mommy Trenches: February 2012

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Little Product Testers

In an attempt to provide us with a calmer and less noisy environment we recently purchased an area rug from Home area rugDepot.  The theory being that if we were to use area rugs we’d somehow be able to muffle the noise that three active kids can make on laminate floors.  I don’t know if you’ve experienced this yourself but with the whole first level being nothing but laminate, we find that the sounds just bounce of the walls and back again.  Not to mention the irritating noise of hot wheels on wood.  

Naturally our children wanted to know why we needed the carpet.  In the old days, my parents would have merely said “because” and left it at that.  In the good ol “new way of parenting” we explain everything.  So we told them how we were hoping that it would make things less noisy downstairs and how we hope to help mommy’s headaches etc.

When the new carpet arrived we deemed it best to lay it out after the kids were in bed.  I know, I know, what mean parents we are wanting to enjoy the luxury of opening a package without six little hands diving in to help.  We only had to shoo them back to bed like three times. 

The next morning; however, we were woken by the shouts and laughter of our three children followed by earth shaking crashes as they jumped off the t.v. stand doing “cannon balls” onto the new carpet.  They landed so hard it shook our bed upstairs.  Breathless, the three of them came running upstairs…

“Mommy, mommy, the carpet doesn’t work….  it’s still noisy.”

Who knew that a new area rug would cause such excitement in the house.  My children have continued to test the noise reducing capabilities of the new rug on a daily basis.  Although I have managed to instill in them the need to refrain from “cannon balling” off the t.v. stand. 

I think we would have been smarter to have purchased ear plugs. 


Tuesday, February 28, 2012

lacking inspiration

I’ve been finding it very hard to post lately.  Partly due to lack of time.  I have no idea how people who work full-time can blog when I find it difficult working part-time.  Not only am I away from home three days a week but when I am home, then I’m back to playing catch up with dishes, laundry, vacuuming etc.  Not to mention getting meals on the table for the family after a hectic day at work. 

The other fact of it is that we’re all in a bit of  down turn at the moment.  We are struggling financially like so many others and that puts a lot of strain on our day to day living.  Plus we are still trying to come to terms with E’s diagnosis and were disappointed to learn that she’s recommending more assessments specifically in regards to Autism and Aspergers. If that’s ruled out then she’s leaning to Organic Brain Dysfunction.  Sounds lovely,right?

Reality is, we are coming to realize more and more just how difficult E can be and how much harder it is getting for us to cope with some of her behaviour.  We can no longer deceive ourselves and think that she’s just a normal child doing normal child things.  Most of the time she is… but it’s all the other stuff that’s driving us crazy.

It’s harder for family because they don’t live with her even though they do consider some of her behaviour as odd and they are prone to dismiss some of the psychologist’s more serious claims such as E is suffering from depression most likely.  What 8 year old suffers from depression? 

So posting has gotten a little difficult these days.  I have discovered that I’d rather not be a whiner after all so many others are going through much worse than we are.  Yet our focus is rather narrow at the moment and has left little room for inspiration on any other topics. 

I would be interested to know how other’s cope with these sorts of diagnosis….

Did you go through a grieving process or were you just so relieved you had a diagnosis?


Thursday, February 16, 2012

Valentine Bust

You would think that since I pretty much spent the weekend cutting out dozens of hearts so that my girls can make adorable Valentines for there friends that I'd be more aware of the fact that today is Valentine's Day.

I have to confess that I have absolutely diddly squat for my husband.  Zip Nada Zilch Nothing.  In fact, if I hadn't reminded Hubs about picking something up for the kiddo's last week, I wouldn't even have had the cheesy little heart shaped boxes filled with kinder egg surprises  to give the kids.

It occurred to me at precisely 4:15 pm on  February 14th while I was driving two of the kids home after dropping off E at her extra learning classes that I hadn't even thought about getting something for my darling husband.  I briefly contemplated stopping somewhere on the way home to grab something only to dismiss the idea as I remembered that one child was sick with a racking cough and was wrapped up in her blankie and the other declined to wear a jacket and was equally snotty trying to get over a cold.

Add to that a trip to the emergency room on the weekend and the business year end to be struggled through where it seems that every opportunity I have to work on the bookkeeping immediately gets derailed by (a) a sick kid and/or (b) a school holiday and there you have it folks romance in a nutshell.  Nonexistent.

Our oldest child was knocked down at church on Sunday and managed to hit the floor so hard that she went a little loopy for a while.  We actually were concerned enough to take her to emergency and turns out she has a concussion.  What a scare.  While she seems fine now apart from the enormous bruise along her jawline, it can't help but concern us since this is the child that they are telling us may be brain damaged.  It may be silly for us to worry, we're not medical doctors so have no idea if our fears are rational or not.  We are supposed to keep her relatively quite for a few days and if I let myself stop to think... I can see myself getting absolutely paranoid that she's going to fall and hit her head again.

I keep thinking we were supposed to go away this weekend.  If we had, it never would have happened.

So it's no wonder that I'm all Valentined out this year.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

The Look

We needed to pop into Home Depot tonight to check out area rugs.  We had found a really nice one online that was on sale and was hoping that they'd have it in store so we could actually see it in person.  Of course, we had to do this errand with three kids in tow.  Normally, I'd rather have a root canal than take three rambuctious kids into a store loaded with power tools and sharp pointy objects.  But you gotta do what you gotta do.

Naturally the kids are bored and choose to entertain themselves by giggling like crazy, running around and hiding in between all the display racks of the hanging area rugs. So they're being a little loud and a little crazy but they were entertaining themselves and hubs and I were actually able to look at the rugs.  The kids weren't climbing on anything, hurting anybody or anything.  Then I turned and saw this young couple staring at my kids and that's when I saw the look. 

You know the look, the one that says... "Look at these kids, I can't believe their parents" and then the couple turns and share the look with each other and walk away.  

I don't know why but it really bothered me.  I went and grabbed my kids and decided it was time to leave. As we were walking away I asked hubs if he had seen the look that woman was giving our kids and he said "yeah" and added "they don't have kids".  

Obviously, they don't have kids or they wouldn't have been so judgmental about mine.  Realizing that didn't help though because you know it would be really nice if we could just go to the store without having to constantly get after our kids for acting up.  Then we wouldn't get those looks and we'd be a lot less stressed shopping for what we need.  The only store our kids truly love going to is Cost-co... for the samples.  Yup.  Free Food makes Cost-co just about the best store on the planet for our kids.  If we say.. "hey kids, do you want to go to Cost-co?"  They start to cheer.  "yeah, the sample store"   I actually don't eat the samples at Cost-co because I feel bad because we almost never buy what they sample.  

In the end kids will be kids. Give them a bit of space and they will run, give them boring surroundings and they will make their own entertainment.  Come to think of it, it would have been oodles of fun playing hide and seek inside those hanging rugs.  It's too bad that couple couldn't appreciate the good, clean fun my kids were having and it's too bad I let it bother me.  

So when's the last time you got the look?


Monday, February 6, 2012

Minds out of the Gutter

Cause it's dirty.. heh heh
The conversation started innocently enough. Hubs had made chili the night before and we were forcing the kids were eagerly scarfing it up when I threw out the encouraging remark about how the chilis is good for you because you know ... it makes you poop.  Cause you know when you want to get down to their level, you gotta mention body functions.  Even hubs raised an eyebrow inquiringly.  Well duh... cause of all the fibre. Beans = Fibre. So yes, it's healthy for you and makes everything work properly to which my daughter jumps into the conversation with..

"My teacher has a ginormous ball"     Uh pardon?
"yeah", pipes up daughter #2, "and it's black"   *snicker* 

"Really so your teacher has a giant black ball?" Hubs and I make eye contact and snicker some more. 

To which my eldest daughter tries to convince us that no, they are not joking, they are telling the truth.

That's nice sweetie, we believe you.

And we prove that both hubs and I have our minds in the gutter... completely. 


Sunday, February 5, 2012

You Still Need Your Mom when You're 40

One of the truths that you realize as you get older is that no matter what you always need your mom.  At least if you had a good relationship with her and even if you didn't, I think there's still a part of you that longs for your parents love, support and advice.  I just hope I remember that bit of comfort when my own children grow up and leave the nest.  That while not expressed, there's still that deep need of your parents.

So when we were dealing with the whole bad news from the psychologist, I naturally turned to my mom.  Like you'd expect she listened, she sympathized and helped me try to puzzle the whole thing out.  While there isn't a whole lot she can do it's nice being able to talk to someone about it.  Because it feels like a big burden on my heart right now. 

So it shouldn't have surprised but it did when I received a call from her mid week asking what our plans were for the weekend.  Turns out she wanted us to come up for the weekend.  Now my parents live about an hour's drive away so we generally make the drive once a week. Only this time she offered to put us up at a hotel so we could stay the weekend and have a bit of a break.  At first I'm thinking how's that a break.  It's us and the kids and a hotel.  But then I realized, no housework, no preparing meals etc for the whole weekend.  Add to that we'd be on their property which is a veritable playground of exploration for my children with their aunt, uncle, cousins and grandparents all to shoulder some of the burden of entertaining them. 

While a stay in a hotel with two kids (the third stayed at Nana's) is not my idea of a good time, the kids were excited to go and explore a different room, watch a movie and snuggle in bed.  In fact, I even  managed to get a stellar sleep because in trying to get the kids to settle down and sleep, I fell asleep at 9:00 pm.  Earliest bed time, I've had in ages.

So I guess moms really do know best even what their 40 year old daughters need.  I just hope I can be that insightful with my own kids.