It's pretty hard to control your blood pressure when you have three young children but that's exactly what I need to do. I went off my blood pressure medication several months ago mainly due to the fact that I never made an appointment to get a new prescription. I'm having a hard time finding the time to see a doctor never mind a new doctor that I haven't met before. I never really bonded with my last new doctor and so I have allowed my health issues to really spiral out of control.
The last time I've had "the test" was 4 years ago when I found I was pregnant with O. It's a good thing I've had three children or I probably wouldn't have submitted for "the test" in the last seven years. I struggled with mood swings, irrational bouts of anger and anxiety and yet.... I've done next to nothing about it. We pretty much figured it's the stress of having three kids under 5 (at the time) and hubby losing his job and us trying to sell our house and living with our inlaws for the past three years. Yeah... that would do it. So when my blood pressure elevated after I had O and never really came down again... we put it down to stress.
Now we're in our own home and while the move was stressfull, you'd think that the stress would be gradually wearing off. How do you cope then with the every day stress of life? Still, the hot weather has not helped and this past weekend my husband moved his video store to a new location, which meant that he's been hardly home for the last week.
So it should have come as no surprise when I felt a tightness in my chest as if I was losing my breath and a weird foggy, fainting sensation come over me while cleaning up after supper Monday night. What did amaze me was that nobody even noticed. Later when I went upstairs I took my blood pressure and found that it indeed was high 154/108.
I'm reluctant to go back on a prescription as one of the side effects is headaches. It's pretty hard to want to interact with your kids or even want to exercise when your head hurts. Plus, while the medication helped bring it down most of the time it still was a little too high. So K went to the health food stood and bought me a bunch of natural stuff to try and lower it.
So far it hasn't helped much but I realize that it will take some time. I have learned that lying down and taking deep breaths actually brings it down quite significantly. Of course, as soon as I start getting more active it creeps up again. Especially when I'm getting after the kids.
But really how can I keep my temper and my blood pressure down when it seems like I literally have to sit in front of them and stare at them to get them to behave? Last night I'm cleaning up after supper and hear a crash in the living room. I discover J had been doing acrobatics on the coffee table and completely up ended it and herself. I'm surprised she wasn't hurt. They've discovered a new trick of hanging over the edge of the pool and sticking their faces in the water, which no matter how many times I told them they weren't to do this, the minute my back was turned they were back doing it again. They see no harm in it whereas I can visualize them leaning too far and getting themselves stuck face down in the water. Before it was sufficient enough for the ladder to not be in the pool and they obeyed the rule that they weren't to step into the pool without one of us being in the back yard but now... like I said they don't think it's a big deal.
Then E decided to paint. That's fine, she's 7. I sit down on the couch try to relax only to find 15 minutes later that after she spent all the time putting the acrylic paints into the paint dish, she decided not to paint and left it for her brother and sister to paint... unsupervised, while she watched t.v. J is 5 and O is 3. The mess they created was neither little nor was it pretty. I go from cleaning orange and blue paint which has now stained my table protector to having to clean up gobs of paint in the sink to cleaning O's face because he always insists on sticking felts, crayons, pens, paints etc in the vicinity of his mouth. Yeah... momma was not happy.
And those are just some of the crazy things they do. I'm proud that they are active, creative little beings but man oh man parenting these active little beings can be tough. Still I shouldn't lose my temper so quick or so much and yelling never really does any good. It seems pretty stupid to yell at the kids to stop yelling.
All I can do right now is to try and keep calm, breath deeply and tell myself "this too shall pass". In another month or so I'm sure all this stress will be behind me.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Thursday, August 26, 2010
I'm Telling Mommy
Don't you just hate it when you hear that? I hate it even more when without even an attempt at working it out I hear the "MOM, blank won't give back my book or blank is touching me or blank is making a face at me".
It's amazing at times how powerless you can feel as a parent. Or even how clueless you feel. I really have no idea how to resolve the constant petty bickering.
We actually had a practice session this week of what to do when someone pulls your hair or hits you. You tell your sibling to stop and then YOU MOVE AWAY. Really, it's so simple. Someone pulls your hair, do you just sit there and let them? No, you move away. The victim doesn't realize that they have a choice too, they can choose not to let themselves get hurt. Obviously that doesn't negate what their sibling is doing to them, but by moving away they are communicating probably more effectively with their body language that the behaviour, in this case hair pulling, is hurting and needs to stop.
And by practice, I do mean practice. E sat on the couch while I gently tugged her hair asking her what she is supposed to do. It amazed me that even while I'm telling her that she needs to get up and walk away, it still took her a long time to do it. I then turned to J and patted her, again gently, while asking her what she needs to do. Again, it took her a while to actually get up and move away.
I think I have reached the point this summer when I'm actually looking forward to school starting again. We've had a great summer but you can always tell when you've hit that point and it's time to be doing something else.
I will only have O at home during school hours come September 7th and I can already imagine how quiet it's going to be.
It's amazing at times how powerless you can feel as a parent. Or even how clueless you feel. I really have no idea how to resolve the constant petty bickering.
We actually had a practice session this week of what to do when someone pulls your hair or hits you. You tell your sibling to stop and then YOU MOVE AWAY. Really, it's so simple. Someone pulls your hair, do you just sit there and let them? No, you move away. The victim doesn't realize that they have a choice too, they can choose not to let themselves get hurt. Obviously that doesn't negate what their sibling is doing to them, but by moving away they are communicating probably more effectively with their body language that the behaviour, in this case hair pulling, is hurting and needs to stop.
And by practice, I do mean practice. E sat on the couch while I gently tugged her hair asking her what she is supposed to do. It amazed me that even while I'm telling her that she needs to get up and walk away, it still took her a long time to do it. I then turned to J and patted her, again gently, while asking her what she needs to do. Again, it took her a while to actually get up and move away.
I think I have reached the point this summer when I'm actually looking forward to school starting again. We've had a great summer but you can always tell when you've hit that point and it's time to be doing something else.
I will only have O at home during school hours come September 7th and I can already imagine how quiet it's going to be.
Friday, August 20, 2010
Wives Say the Weirdest Things
We've been cursed blessed with unbelievably warm summer weather this year and as a result my feet are suffering. I mean well and I really do try but somehow between showering, tweezing and getting dressed I run out of time for moisturizing and I usually end up with really rough and nasty looking feet. Which I hate.
So I've been trying my best to remember to moisturize even going so far as to buy new moisturizer that smells not only yummy (French Vanilla) but also has a convenient pump so I wont have to fumble with caps etc.
Well that night I decided that I was going to really lather up my feet and wear a pair of socks to bed and hopefully wake up with soft feet. So I lather my feet with cream, put on my socks and proceed to get ready for bed. Of course, hubby is finished and already in bed waiting for me to complete my bathroom routine.
As I shuffle by in my sock feet (I hate socks), I realize he was watching me and he had the look. Ladies, I am sure you know what I mean by this. I can't remember exactly what was said but somehow or other it was conveyed that he was feeling "frisky" to which I burst out with:
"But I've got my socks on!"
Well, that cracked us both up. I mean doesn't that just beat "I have a headache"? Of course, he wants to know what is the big deal about socks and I'm like, I don't think I've ever done it with socks on. I mean, gee, I'm not a guy if you know what I mean. Although I'm sure it happened in our pre kid days when life was a little more spontaneous.
Of course, you never know but I might like having my socks on. That could be our new catch phrase... "oh honnnnney... I've got my socks on!". I dare anyone to try and crack that code. (Anyone who hasn't read this blog, that is)
Like when we were first married we had this game where every time we said something at the same time one of us would try to say "Coke" before the other one. Whoever said it first was owed a coke or in our case.. sex. ;) Of course, I probably owed him 100,000 cokes because really who could keep up with that? Still it gave us a giggle every time we were around other people to know we were playing this silly game and no one was the wiser. Ah, we were so young once.
Still... I took my socks off.
So I've been trying my best to remember to moisturize even going so far as to buy new moisturizer that smells not only yummy (French Vanilla) but also has a convenient pump so I wont have to fumble with caps etc.
Well that night I decided that I was going to really lather up my feet and wear a pair of socks to bed and hopefully wake up with soft feet. So I lather my feet with cream, put on my socks and proceed to get ready for bed. Of course, hubby is finished and already in bed waiting for me to complete my bathroom routine.
As I shuffle by in my sock feet (I hate socks), I realize he was watching me and he had the look. Ladies, I am sure you know what I mean by this. I can't remember exactly what was said but somehow or other it was conveyed that he was feeling "frisky" to which I burst out with:
"But I've got my socks on!"
Well, that cracked us both up. I mean doesn't that just beat "I have a headache"? Of course, he wants to know what is the big deal about socks and I'm like, I don't think I've ever done it with socks on. I mean, gee, I'm not a guy if you know what I mean. Although I'm sure it happened in our pre kid days when life was a little more spontaneous.
Of course, you never know but I might like having my socks on. That could be our new catch phrase... "oh honnnnney... I've got my socks on!". I dare anyone to try and crack that code. (Anyone who hasn't read this blog, that is)
Like when we were first married we had this game where every time we said something at the same time one of us would try to say "Coke" before the other one. Whoever said it first was owed a coke or in our case.. sex. ;) Of course, I probably owed him 100,000 cokes because really who could keep up with that? Still it gave us a giggle every time we were around other people to know we were playing this silly game and no one was the wiser. Ah, we were so young once.
Still... I took my socks off.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
I'm Not Trying to Be A Perfect Mother
As you may know I have been reading a couple of parenting books by Alyson Schafer called "Breaking the Good Mom Myth" and "Honey, I've Wrecked the Kids". Both are very great books and definitely a helpful resource if you are having problems with getting your children to listen.
One of the things that I read in the first book was about how we are not responsible for the relationship between the siblings. In fact, if we are constantly interferring and refereeing their bickering and squabling we are actually damaging their relationships as well as setting up a winner and loser situation.
I thought that was what I was supposed to do, evaluate the argument and then determine who was in the right and who was in the wrong. Only how does that end up being fair when half the time you don't really see what happened? Doesn't the oldest one generally end up being the fall guy er kid since they're the oldest and should know better?
(I may not have that exactly verbatim from the book as I don't have the book in front of me but that is the gist as how I understood it.)
So I said to myself, I'm paraphrasing but you get the gist.
And that's what I did. What I wasn't expecting was the liberating feeling I got from backing off. When I heard the voices raised upstairs, I told myself to keep out of it, let them resolve it and I probably had the first peaceful day I had had in a long time. It was amazing. Not that everything went perfectly smoothly, after all the kids have to learn how to resolve their conflicts with one another and since my oldest has turned into a little lecturing (gee,where did she get that from) I do find it particularly difficult to listen to her harangue the younger two over some infraction they've committed against her.
And I have had to listen to E whine "work it out, work out" back at me and listen to her tell her siblings that "mommy doesn't care" because she sees my backing off as a lack of caring. Still, I can see that it will be worth it in the long run. After all, how many of us actually stop to consider that their learning to work together and resolve their problems now will benefit them when they are adults. How often have you heard the phrase "conflict resolution"? Well that's what these mini beings are learning from a very young age much like they are learning their ABCs. Only if we rob them of the opportunities to learn by solving every little problem that arises, we are not doing them any favours.
As for the rest of the book, I'm still working it out, trying to stumble my way through logical consequences, recognizing the attention seeker vs the power seeker and positive punishments but then I'm only half way through the second book. We can't afford to buy new books these days and Alyson's books appear to be very popular. I read part of her book and then had to surrender it back to the library for another anxious parent. I only just got it back again being fifth down the list.
My mom laughed at me when I started telling her about these books. I thought she'd be supportive after all the first book talks about stepping back from trying to be the perfect mother. But no, she said, "You will stress yourself out more reading all these books and trying to be the perfect parent."
My response: "I'm not trying to be a perfect parent, I'm just trying to find some peace."
One of the things that I read in the first book was about how we are not responsible for the relationship between the siblings. In fact, if we are constantly interferring and refereeing their bickering and squabling we are actually damaging their relationships as well as setting up a winner and loser situation.
I thought that was what I was supposed to do, evaluate the argument and then determine who was in the right and who was in the wrong. Only how does that end up being fair when half the time you don't really see what happened? Doesn't the oldest one generally end up being the fall guy er kid since they're the oldest and should know better?
(I may not have that exactly verbatim from the book as I don't have the book in front of me but that is the gist as how I understood it.)
So I said to myself, I'm paraphrasing but you get the gist.
"okay, I'm going to back off and let them fight it out, unless they get physical, and when they call to me to jump in and resolve for them I am going to be empathetic but tell them they need to work it out with each other."
And that's what I did. What I wasn't expecting was the liberating feeling I got from backing off. When I heard the voices raised upstairs, I told myself to keep out of it, let them resolve it and I probably had the first peaceful day I had had in a long time. It was amazing. Not that everything went perfectly smoothly, after all the kids have to learn how to resolve their conflicts with one another and since my oldest has turned into a little lecturing (gee,where did she get that from) I do find it particularly difficult to listen to her harangue the younger two over some infraction they've committed against her.
And I have had to listen to E whine "work it out, work out" back at me and listen to her tell her siblings that "mommy doesn't care" because she sees my backing off as a lack of caring. Still, I can see that it will be worth it in the long run. After all, how many of us actually stop to consider that their learning to work together and resolve their problems now will benefit them when they are adults. How often have you heard the phrase "conflict resolution"? Well that's what these mini beings are learning from a very young age much like they are learning their ABCs. Only if we rob them of the opportunities to learn by solving every little problem that arises, we are not doing them any favours.
As for the rest of the book, I'm still working it out, trying to stumble my way through logical consequences, recognizing the attention seeker vs the power seeker and positive punishments but then I'm only half way through the second book. We can't afford to buy new books these days and Alyson's books appear to be very popular. I read part of her book and then had to surrender it back to the library for another anxious parent. I only just got it back again being fifth down the list.
My mom laughed at me when I started telling her about these books. I thought she'd be supportive after all the first book talks about stepping back from trying to be the perfect mother. But no, she said, "You will stress yourself out more reading all these books and trying to be the perfect parent."
My response: "I'm not trying to be a perfect parent, I'm just trying to find some peace."
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Follow Me, I'm Canadian Bloghop
For the first time I've actually remembered to participate on Wednesday over at Canadian Mom's Follow Me I'm Canadian Bloghop. I think it's an amazing opportunity to get out there and meet (read about) other Canadian bloggers. Who knows, maybe I'll discover someone who is local to me. So if you are from Canada and haven't heard about the Bloghop it happens every wednesday at Follow Me. I'm Canadian.
I haven't been posting a whole lot lately what with summer activities and moving my business and it's too bad my most recent post deals with me having a headache and being bummed out about my parenting abilities. Not exactly the best example of me but hey, it's real and that's what this is all about. You can always check out my About Me page and Some of My Favourite Posts page.
Thanks for stopping by!
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Randomness and a Headache
Random notes from my back porch journalling: Friday, August 13, 2010 (yes, originally handwritten people... what a shocker!)
I have a headache to such a point that reading either on the computer or a book makes my eyes hurt. Being a mom though means I can't slouch back off to bed but take my notebook outside instead to supervise the children.
Why is it that whenever you really want to exercise or do it right, you have your tiredest day where all you can think of or your greatest desire is to catch a few ZZZzs? And you're not a nap person.
I have realized that my headaches make me eat more and considering I have been suffering with migraines for the past couple of years, this is not a good thing. It's like I am trying to eat away the pain. Tylenol doesn't work, Advil doesn't work, my subconscious brain thinks maybe it's a lack of food headache and that will help. It never does. I'm getting worried about my weight.
I am tried of people asking if I'm pregnant or when I'm due. When I was pregnant people just thought I was fat. Now that I'm just fat, people think I'm pregnant. At J's dance camp an older lady made a comment to me completely out of the blue how she "bet I couldn't get down on the floor." (some of the moms were sitting around on the floor inside the dance studio). It took me a few moments to figure out why she'd say that to me. AS it occurred to me, I dropped y hands and tried to suck in my gut silently7 praying she wouldn't make any more obvious pregnant remarks in front of this room full of moms. While my next thought was that if she did ask me when I was due, I was going to lie and tell her October.
Some days I can laugh about it. Some days I cry. This was just a cringe day.
I've been reading "Honey, I've wrecked the Kids" by Alyson Schafer. I first read breaking the Good Mom Myth. I found that book very liberating. This book... has made me realize or rather affirmed what an awful mother I am. I hate to say verbal abuse.. but that really is me and my husband. We both have to get the last word in. We are both so frustrated we tend to over lecture, over stress and even anticipate failure with snide little comments thrown in for good measure. My daughter freaked out one day in front of my mother and threw around a lot of big words like consequences, comprehension, responsibility etc... and my mom was like OMG she sounds just like her mother. I try so hard to be patient but by 4:00 pm I'm all tapped out, especially if they've been bickering lots. Add in there PMS, a few late nights and my patience and temper are unpredictable even to me. How can I start to change the patterns if I can't even keep it together a week at a time?
Why do people leave anonymous comments? I get it if you don't have a blogger account etc and you really want to contribute to the conversation. I even understand if you're trying to promote your own website and you really only pop in to leave a link. But really what satisfaction could you possibly get by leaving a vague and poorly written comment in bad English in which the word Viagra is thrown around a few times without even a link? I just don't get it.
I won the Underway contest 4 times. FOUR times. I can only claim one prize but still... you think someone out there really thinks I should lose weight? Yeah, me too.
Isn't it kind of like Murphy's law that you teach your kids to stay in bed and they obey you to the point where they call you repeatedly, you go upstairs to find out what they want, only to discover they need a drink so you have to go all the way back downstairs to grab them a cup and a drink, and then go back upstairs and get it for them. Whereas, if they weren't so busy obeying you, they would have just come halfway down the stairs at least to inform you what they needed so you only had to make the trip once.
Now my hands hurts too.
I have a headache to such a point that reading either on the computer or a book makes my eyes hurt. Being a mom though means I can't slouch back off to bed but take my notebook outside instead to supervise the children.
Why is it that whenever you really want to exercise or do it right, you have your tiredest day where all you can think of or your greatest desire is to catch a few ZZZzs? And you're not a nap person.
I have realized that my headaches make me eat more and considering I have been suffering with migraines for the past couple of years, this is not a good thing. It's like I am trying to eat away the pain. Tylenol doesn't work, Advil doesn't work, my subconscious brain thinks maybe it's a lack of food headache and that will help. It never does. I'm getting worried about my weight.
I am tried of people asking if I'm pregnant or when I'm due. When I was pregnant people just thought I was fat. Now that I'm just fat, people think I'm pregnant. At J's dance camp an older lady made a comment to me completely out of the blue how she "bet I couldn't get down on the floor." (some of the moms were sitting around on the floor inside the dance studio). It took me a few moments to figure out why she'd say that to me. AS it occurred to me, I dropped y hands and tried to suck in my gut silently7 praying she wouldn't make any more obvious pregnant remarks in front of this room full of moms. While my next thought was that if she did ask me when I was due, I was going to lie and tell her October.
Some days I can laugh about it. Some days I cry. This was just a cringe day.
I've been reading "Honey, I've wrecked the Kids" by Alyson Schafer. I first read breaking the Good Mom Myth. I found that book very liberating. This book... has made me realize or rather affirmed what an awful mother I am. I hate to say verbal abuse.. but that really is me and my husband. We both have to get the last word in. We are both so frustrated we tend to over lecture, over stress and even anticipate failure with snide little comments thrown in for good measure. My daughter freaked out one day in front of my mother and threw around a lot of big words like consequences, comprehension, responsibility etc... and my mom was like OMG she sounds just like her mother. I try so hard to be patient but by 4:00 pm I'm all tapped out, especially if they've been bickering lots. Add in there PMS, a few late nights and my patience and temper are unpredictable even to me. How can I start to change the patterns if I can't even keep it together a week at a time?
Why do people leave anonymous comments? I get it if you don't have a blogger account etc and you really want to contribute to the conversation. I even understand if you're trying to promote your own website and you really only pop in to leave a link. But really what satisfaction could you possibly get by leaving a vague and poorly written comment in bad English in which the word Viagra is thrown around a few times without even a link? I just don't get it.
I won the Underway contest 4 times. FOUR times. I can only claim one prize but still... you think someone out there really thinks I should lose weight? Yeah, me too.
Isn't it kind of like Murphy's law that you teach your kids to stay in bed and they obey you to the point where they call you repeatedly, you go upstairs to find out what they want, only to discover they need a drink so you have to go all the way back downstairs to grab them a cup and a drink, and then go back upstairs and get it for them. Whereas, if they weren't so busy obeying you, they would have just come halfway down the stairs at least to inform you what they needed so you only had to make the trip once.
Now my hands hurts too.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Remiss
I have been a little remiss in my posting lately. Mainly it's because I've been reading. I have since finished the Inkheart series and yes it did end rather bitter sweetly as I had suspected. We went away on the weekend to a resort on a little island not far from home to help celebrate a good friend's 40th. While browsing at a local bookstore on the way back on Sunday, I discovered a reprint of Stephen King's novel, The Stand.
I've always loved this book as well as the film that they made from it. The film stays pretty close to the novel and the changes they made are pretty obvious as to why they made them. Despite the fact that I have read this book at least 3 times, if not more, I completely got sucked into this story and could barely put it down. As long as the kids were playing quietly together, I was reading. I'd look around my house and would justify myself that I'd get the dishes down when I made lunch or after we picked E up from dance or a 100 different little excuses and ended up doing barely nothing but read for the past three days. I finally finished it yesterday and last night I popped in the movie because, of course, I own it.
Unfortunately I didn't get to watch much of it because my husband came home and was disappointed that I started watching it without out him. So good wifey that I was restarted the movie from the beginning. It's at least 4 hours long. Of course, as soon as we start watching it, he gets up starts making himself a snack etc and I'm continually having to pause it. It really ticked me off when he picked up the newspaper and I think he must have realized it because he sat it down saying there's nothing of interest in it. After all, we could have continued on from where I was but I thought he really wanted to watch it.
So we ended up calling it quits before we even got as far as I had been in the film originally.
Sigh.
I've always loved this book as well as the film that they made from it. The film stays pretty close to the novel and the changes they made are pretty obvious as to why they made them. Despite the fact that I have read this book at least 3 times, if not more, I completely got sucked into this story and could barely put it down. As long as the kids were playing quietly together, I was reading. I'd look around my house and would justify myself that I'd get the dishes down when I made lunch or after we picked E up from dance or a 100 different little excuses and ended up doing barely nothing but read for the past three days. I finally finished it yesterday and last night I popped in the movie because, of course, I own it.
Unfortunately I didn't get to watch much of it because my husband came home and was disappointed that I started watching it without out him. So good wifey that I was restarted the movie from the beginning. It's at least 4 hours long. Of course, as soon as we start watching it, he gets up starts making himself a snack etc and I'm continually having to pause it. It really ticked me off when he picked up the newspaper and I think he must have realized it because he sat it down saying there's nothing of interest in it. After all, we could have continued on from where I was but I thought he really wanted to watch it.
So we ended up calling it quits before we even got as far as I had been in the film originally.
Sigh.
Monday, August 9, 2010
Inkheart Series
Have you ever read a book that you were enjoying so much you didn't want to see it end? I have that with the Inkheart series. This is really such a complex and rich series that I find it hard to believe that it was written for youth.
I, of course, was intrigued by the movie and kept thinking to myself that perhaps I'd read the book one day. I came across the series, beautifully bound in a gift set in Scholastic Books. I learned that my niece had just started to read the series so what a perfect gift for her. I had to admit that I was tempted to buy a set for myself, they were that beautiful but I really couldn't justify the extra expense at Christmas. Still, I hoped to one day find them used at a second hand book store. Unfortunately, it's such a popular series that not only couldn't I find used copies but I had to go on a waiting list at the library for them.
Finally, my turn came up and I now have the final book in my possession. Yet, I find myself curiously reluctant to finish this book. I have even set it aside to read another book and have just picked it up again knowing that I only have another week or so before I have to return it.
For one, the story is so complex that you never really know what's going to happen next. You just think everything is going to start to work out for a change when the author throws in another twist and the good guys are struggling again. I even find myself putting it down when one of these new crisis arise just so I can shake my head over the turn of events and even ponder how they are going to get out of it. Never before I have it dragged a book out quite so much.
I think my reluctance stems from the fact that this is the last book of the series. Once I'm done that will be it, the story will have been told and I have a feeling I'm not going to completely like the ending. If the ending goes like any of the rest of the story it's going to end off on a bittersweet note and most likely involve the death of one of my favourite characters.
Have you read the Inkheart series? What did you think? Or have you ever read a book that you were reluctant to see end?
I, of course, was intrigued by the movie and kept thinking to myself that perhaps I'd read the book one day. I came across the series, beautifully bound in a gift set in Scholastic Books. I learned that my niece had just started to read the series so what a perfect gift for her. I had to admit that I was tempted to buy a set for myself, they were that beautiful but I really couldn't justify the extra expense at Christmas. Still, I hoped to one day find them used at a second hand book store. Unfortunately, it's such a popular series that not only couldn't I find used copies but I had to go on a waiting list at the library for them.
Finally, my turn came up and I now have the final book in my possession. Yet, I find myself curiously reluctant to finish this book. I have even set it aside to read another book and have just picked it up again knowing that I only have another week or so before I have to return it.
For one, the story is so complex that you never really know what's going to happen next. You just think everything is going to start to work out for a change when the author throws in another twist and the good guys are struggling again. I even find myself putting it down when one of these new crisis arise just so I can shake my head over the turn of events and even ponder how they are going to get out of it. Never before I have it dragged a book out quite so much.
I think my reluctance stems from the fact that this is the last book of the series. Once I'm done that will be it, the story will have been told and I have a feeling I'm not going to completely like the ending. If the ending goes like any of the rest of the story it's going to end off on a bittersweet note and most likely involve the death of one of my favourite characters.
Have you read the Inkheart series? What did you think? Or have you ever read a book that you were reluctant to see end?
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Play House Disney - Canada Blog Tour and Giveaway ENDED
Plus it's also not just empty t.v., each show teaches simple math problems and discusses how to solve many problems that we might find in life such as sharing, what to do when we're scared, etc. I love listening to the kids sing along with their catchy tunes and have found myself frequently dancing to one of the Imagination Mover's upbeat songs. I just love how I feel safe leaving the t.v. set on Playhouse Disney because I don't have to worry about something inappropriate showing up.
Playhouse Disney also has a great website with great games and activities that my children love to play... over and over again. Want to receive updates? Check out Playhouse Disney's Facebook page.
If you're not unsure whether or not your area receives the Disney Playhouse Channel check their list.
Best of all: One lucky reader will win a Playhouse Disney Prize Pack containing a Playhouse Disney DVD with five episodes, pencils, a magnetic pen, and colouring magnets! This giveaway is limited to Canadian residents only and will close at midnight PST on August 18, 2010.
Side note: There are multiple blogs running the same giveaway promo on behalf on Mom Central. You may feel free to enter to win on as many blogs as you like, however you will only be eligible to win once as part of the Playhouse Disney Canada blog tour contest.The winners will be contacted via email and will have 48 hours to respond before I have to choose a new winner.
To Enter: Comment and let me know what your child's (or your's) favourite show is.
For Extra Optional Entries :
- Follow my blog using Google Friend Connect and leave a comment
- Follow me on Twitter AND tweet about this giveaway and leave a comment. You may use the following:
Win a Playhouse Disney Prize Pack @Zeemaid (CAN Only) http://bit.ly/9qatgz #PlayhouseDisneyCanada
Disclosure: I am participating in the Playhouse Disney program by Mom Central. I received a Playhouse Disney prize pack and a thank you gift card to facilitate this post. The opinions on this blog are my own.
Looking for more Canadian friendly giveaways? Why not check out Mom Vs. The Boys where our lovely host provides a linky every thursday for giveaways guaranteed to be available to Canadians.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
I Marry You Morrow
O was going out with his dad.
Me: What, you're leaving me? I'm gonna miss you.
O: I be back mom, I marry you morrow.
Me: You're going to marry me tomorrow?
O: Yup, I marry you morrow.
Me: Well, okay make sure you buy me a present first though, okay?
O: Okay, Mom, I buy you present and I marry you.
Me: Okay sweetie, have fun.
That night as I tucked a sleepy boy in bed.
Me: Good night sweetie, I love you.
O: (gives hug and kiss) I marry morrow mom.
Me: Okay, good night.
Next day:
O: Give kiss mom, I marry you.
Me: (kiss) where's my present?
O: (blank look)
Daddy: HAH!
O: Here, (gives me rock) Okay we married now, (runs off outside).
Me: What, you're leaving me? I'm gonna miss you.
O: I be back mom, I marry you morrow.
Me: You're going to marry me tomorrow?
O: Yup, I marry you morrow.
Me: Well, okay make sure you buy me a present first though, okay?
O: Okay, Mom, I buy you present and I marry you.
Me: Okay sweetie, have fun.
That night as I tucked a sleepy boy in bed.
Me: Good night sweetie, I love you.
O: (gives hug and kiss) I marry morrow mom.
Me: Okay, good night.
Next day:
O: Give kiss mom, I marry you.
Me: (kiss) where's my present?
O: (blank look)
Daddy: HAH!
O: Here, (gives me rock) Okay we married now, (runs off outside).
Monday, August 2, 2010
To Save A Life - Movie Review
I thought I'd mention this movie this week since it's a smaller title and most likely will get lost what with films like Kick-Ass and Diary of A Wimpy Kid coming out this week.
It's about a teen who comes to terms with the suicide of his childhood friend, facing his own problems and discovering faith and a life worth living for. I was pretty hesitant about watching it because if you know me at all, I don't like sad things and at times it is quite sad. I also thought it might be a cheesy movie considering it is a small title and a faith based film as well. I'm sorry to offend but a lot of those types of films can come across as quite cheesy and not always well acted. I have seen some good ones and I have seen some very bad ones.
Still, I said to my husband if we don't like it we'll just shut it off. Well we got so sucked in we watched the whole thing despite the sad bits and the late hour. It was well acted and very well written. I think this movie would be great to watch with older teen children because it shows how every kid has struggles and often deal with feeling alone. Even the so called popular kids have their issues. It also dealt candidly with some flaws that we often see in church. For example, it comes out that the main character had gotten his girlfriend pregnant. Of course this all happened prior to his starting to discover faith but the head pastor didn't want him around the other teens. Here this kid is trying to find God and do the right thing and they are afraid he will "contaminate" the other children. Coming from a church background I have seen this narrow minded thinking before. Of course, I'd understand their thinking if this kid had professed to be a Christian all along and then started having premarried sex etc.
Anyways, it was still nice to see the kids rallying around and supporting each other and "owning" their own behaviour towards the kid who killed himself and how they started to heal and and help other lonely kids. All in all it was an inspiring film despite the sad topic.
Definitely worth checking out. Not, of course, if your husband is only into action flicks. ;)
It's about a teen who comes to terms with the suicide of his childhood friend, facing his own problems and discovering faith and a life worth living for. I was pretty hesitant about watching it because if you know me at all, I don't like sad things and at times it is quite sad. I also thought it might be a cheesy movie considering it is a small title and a faith based film as well. I'm sorry to offend but a lot of those types of films can come across as quite cheesy and not always well acted. I have seen some good ones and I have seen some very bad ones.
Still, I said to my husband if we don't like it we'll just shut it off. Well we got so sucked in we watched the whole thing despite the sad bits and the late hour. It was well acted and very well written. I think this movie would be great to watch with older teen children because it shows how every kid has struggles and often deal with feeling alone. Even the so called popular kids have their issues. It also dealt candidly with some flaws that we often see in church. For example, it comes out that the main character had gotten his girlfriend pregnant. Of course this all happened prior to his starting to discover faith but the head pastor didn't want him around the other teens. Here this kid is trying to find God and do the right thing and they are afraid he will "contaminate" the other children. Coming from a church background I have seen this narrow minded thinking before. Of course, I'd understand their thinking if this kid had professed to be a Christian all along and then started having premarried sex etc.
Anyways, it was still nice to see the kids rallying around and supporting each other and "owning" their own behaviour towards the kid who killed himself and how they started to heal and and help other lonely kids. All in all it was an inspiring film despite the sad topic.
Definitely worth checking out. Not, of course, if your husband is only into action flicks. ;)
I am worse than a child!
Our Sunday did not go well and I have to say that it was pretty much my fault. I do not know why I act this way some times, perhaps you could tell me?
This is what happened.
We talked about going to the beach on Sunday. We get up, have breakfast and I go have my shower. I had sent J to her room because of her whining and talking back and when I saw the state of her room I instructed her to pick it up. Which, of course, prompted more whining and back talking so I got even more annoyed and told her if it wasn't done by the time my shower was over the rest was going in the garage.
So I go shower, I hear raised voices and arguing and when I'm done my shower I come out to find hubby helping J organize and put away her toys. This ticked me off for some reason. Partly because I had already done that this week and it was pointless as her room was completely turned out within a day and also partly because we were supposed to be going to the beach today, why would he start that kind of project at this time.
Still, I tell myself he couldn't very well take a shower when I was, could he? Well, maybe he could but the point was to get clean and get ready to go out. But he always does this when we have plans, just lazes around for as long as possible and then blames me that he didn't shower earlier because I was in the shower. He could have showered before me or even better.. jump in the shower as soon as I am done. I don't even have to be dressed, it's not like the kids need that much supervision now.
So half an hour goes by, he's still not showered, he's been after the kids continually (and has been all weekend in fact) and I next find him sitting on the couch watching cartoons with the kids. I ask him if I should call my mom (to see if we're going to their campsite) and he ignored me. Some other tiff occurs with the children and he's back upstairs getting after them. Finally he gets in the shower and comes down to a messy kitchen and I can tell by the way he stopped and the look on his face that he was annoyed I hadn't done this.
If you've read my blog earlier this week, you will understand a little of where I am coming from. The day before we had been working on the garage. I worked just as hard as he did, yet I still was the one to make the meals and clean up the mess after every meal. He'd just get up and bugger off to the garage leaving me with the mess and even when he came back from hauling stuff to the dump, did I get any help with dinner. Not a bit. He just crashed on the couch. So I thought to myself that there was no bloody way I was cleaning up the mess, and getting all the kids ready to go while he lounged around in the shower. Cause that's usually what happens. I usually end up doing it all while he's showering.
If he hadn't had that look on his face, I would have jumped up and helped. I don't mind doing the work together. But he started slamming things around as he started tidying up the kitchen. Which drives me crazy. I have to clean the mess all the time and I don't show my displeasure with sighs, grunts and slams when I do it. (okay sometimes I do but not generally).
So I buggered off upstairs and sat in the window seat. There I sat staring out the window contemplating my life and regrets and started to become depressed. My children soon followed me, of course, and ended up playing around me on the window seat and in the cradle. Which helped to take my mind off my own sad thoughts and made me realize why I read so much. If my mind isn't occupied, I'm too apt to dwell on the past.
Hubby eventually saunters in and asks if I've called my parents. I told him I had asked him if I should over an hour ago and he never answered me. His response.. "well I guess you better get on it". That's it. Nothing major, nothing harsh or silly. Yet, I was annoyed. So I just sat there while one by one they all left. Eventually I did come downstairs to find them all sitting like bumps watching t.v. I asked if that's all they were going to do... sit on the couch and watch t.v. ?
He, of course, was waiting for me to call. And I would have but why couldn't he have been getting ready to go? IF we didn't go to my parent's we were going to go to a beach closer to home. So either way we were going out. Why were they sitting watching t.v.?
Eventually the kids petitioned to go outside and they did. K finally asked me if we were doing anything and I responded I don't know. I did tell him that I was annoyed because he hadn't answered me this morning and how I didn't like his reaction to the messy kitchen, how I keep getting dumped on with all the work. I said it all nicely and calmly but of course I also had to throw in there... "and there you are sitting on your ass watching t.v. (he had at this point started watching Criminal Minds) when we've got piles up carpet, boxes and vinyl loaded up in front of the washer what needs to go in the crawlspace (this from our clean up of the garage on Sat) and I am not doing laundry until it's gone. I am not climbing over boxes to do it). Man like, he says nothing .. well I think he muttered, paused his show, got up and started hauling crap out of the closet, none too gently, so as to get access to the crawl space. Then he proceeded to vacuum.
Why oh why do men not get it? Just because I say help me... doesn't mean help me this minute. It doesn't mean that I want to drop everything, all our plans just so you can vacuum. Then he goes back and sits down on the couch and turns the t.v. back on. WTF?
Meanwhile the kids had been bugging me the whole time about going in the pool but I said no thinking we were going out. So I went outside and said I guessed they could go in the pool since daddy only wants to watch t.v.
And that was it... for the rest of the day. We still could have ended up going, it wasn't too late but when he decided to sit down and watch t.v. I gave up.
Of course, your mind goes back over everything that happens so as to be fully armed with every word that was said, every look that was sent so that when the arguments start you are prepared and justified in what you had done. Only I knew I had myself to blame. Sure he did minor petty annoying things but really, it was my own stubborness that really actually ruined our entire day.
Of course, when his show was done he stomped around the house some more. Oh he talked nicely to me but he'd disappear upstairs and then into the garage and then come out and announce that he fixed E's bike. Ladies, I had been asking him to fix that bike for weeks.
I tell you I cried like I hadn't in a really long time. Still when you tend to be a crier and well up over almost every argument, tears come across to him like no big deal. Why should he care that I was crying when I tend to tear up over most arguments anyways.
Like I said, it could have all been avoided. If I had just kept my mouth shut we would have been off to the beach. Better yet if I hadn't allowed myself to get annoyed way at the beginning and just called my mother, none of it would have happened.
I didn't really need to get into with him at that particular moment. I actually had been communicating some of my frustrations to him periodically throughout the week as conversations come up and as most of you know, it's better not to them over the head with it but give them something to ponder. Even so, it's still frustrating because while he listens, he never acknowledges the justness of my feelings or sometimes even he just laughs it off.
When I called my father that evening to talk to him about something else, I wasn't surprised when he told me that my mother had expected me to call that morning. Try and explain to your parents why you didn't bring their grandchildren out to see them because their mother was acting like a big baby.
It still bums me out. It's not like we can't go to the beach another day. It's just that I only generally take them when their dad's home and that's only on the weekends. Next weekend K and I are away and the summer is almost over. K is moving his video store in a couple of weeks so ventures to the beach are going to get pretty scarce. Every summer ends with a.... I wish we had done more things with the kids.
sigh.
This is what happened.
We talked about going to the beach on Sunday. We get up, have breakfast and I go have my shower. I had sent J to her room because of her whining and talking back and when I saw the state of her room I instructed her to pick it up. Which, of course, prompted more whining and back talking so I got even more annoyed and told her if it wasn't done by the time my shower was over the rest was going in the garage.
So I go shower, I hear raised voices and arguing and when I'm done my shower I come out to find hubby helping J organize and put away her toys. This ticked me off for some reason. Partly because I had already done that this week and it was pointless as her room was completely turned out within a day and also partly because we were supposed to be going to the beach today, why would he start that kind of project at this time.
Still, I tell myself he couldn't very well take a shower when I was, could he? Well, maybe he could but the point was to get clean and get ready to go out. But he always does this when we have plans, just lazes around for as long as possible and then blames me that he didn't shower earlier because I was in the shower. He could have showered before me or even better.. jump in the shower as soon as I am done. I don't even have to be dressed, it's not like the kids need that much supervision now.
So half an hour goes by, he's still not showered, he's been after the kids continually (and has been all weekend in fact) and I next find him sitting on the couch watching cartoons with the kids. I ask him if I should call my mom (to see if we're going to their campsite) and he ignored me. Some other tiff occurs with the children and he's back upstairs getting after them. Finally he gets in the shower and comes down to a messy kitchen and I can tell by the way he stopped and the look on his face that he was annoyed I hadn't done this.
If you've read my blog earlier this week, you will understand a little of where I am coming from. The day before we had been working on the garage. I worked just as hard as he did, yet I still was the one to make the meals and clean up the mess after every meal. He'd just get up and bugger off to the garage leaving me with the mess and even when he came back from hauling stuff to the dump, did I get any help with dinner. Not a bit. He just crashed on the couch. So I thought to myself that there was no bloody way I was cleaning up the mess, and getting all the kids ready to go while he lounged around in the shower. Cause that's usually what happens. I usually end up doing it all while he's showering.
If he hadn't had that look on his face, I would have jumped up and helped. I don't mind doing the work together. But he started slamming things around as he started tidying up the kitchen. Which drives me crazy. I have to clean the mess all the time and I don't show my displeasure with sighs, grunts and slams when I do it. (okay sometimes I do but not generally).
So I buggered off upstairs and sat in the window seat. There I sat staring out the window contemplating my life and regrets and started to become depressed. My children soon followed me, of course, and ended up playing around me on the window seat and in the cradle. Which helped to take my mind off my own sad thoughts and made me realize why I read so much. If my mind isn't occupied, I'm too apt to dwell on the past.
Hubby eventually saunters in and asks if I've called my parents. I told him I had asked him if I should over an hour ago and he never answered me. His response.. "well I guess you better get on it". That's it. Nothing major, nothing harsh or silly. Yet, I was annoyed. So I just sat there while one by one they all left. Eventually I did come downstairs to find them all sitting like bumps watching t.v. I asked if that's all they were going to do... sit on the couch and watch t.v. ?
He, of course, was waiting for me to call. And I would have but why couldn't he have been getting ready to go? IF we didn't go to my parent's we were going to go to a beach closer to home. So either way we were going out. Why were they sitting watching t.v.?
Eventually the kids petitioned to go outside and they did. K finally asked me if we were doing anything and I responded I don't know. I did tell him that I was annoyed because he hadn't answered me this morning and how I didn't like his reaction to the messy kitchen, how I keep getting dumped on with all the work. I said it all nicely and calmly but of course I also had to throw in there... "and there you are sitting on your ass watching t.v. (he had at this point started watching Criminal Minds) when we've got piles up carpet, boxes and vinyl loaded up in front of the washer what needs to go in the crawlspace (this from our clean up of the garage on Sat) and I am not doing laundry until it's gone. I am not climbing over boxes to do it). Man like, he says nothing .. well I think he muttered, paused his show, got up and started hauling crap out of the closet, none too gently, so as to get access to the crawl space. Then he proceeded to vacuum.
Why oh why do men not get it? Just because I say help me... doesn't mean help me this minute. It doesn't mean that I want to drop everything, all our plans just so you can vacuum. Then he goes back and sits down on the couch and turns the t.v. back on. WTF?
Meanwhile the kids had been bugging me the whole time about going in the pool but I said no thinking we were going out. So I went outside and said I guessed they could go in the pool since daddy only wants to watch t.v.
And that was it... for the rest of the day. We still could have ended up going, it wasn't too late but when he decided to sit down and watch t.v. I gave up.
Of course, your mind goes back over everything that happens so as to be fully armed with every word that was said, every look that was sent so that when the arguments start you are prepared and justified in what you had done. Only I knew I had myself to blame. Sure he did minor petty annoying things but really, it was my own stubborness that really actually ruined our entire day.
Of course, when his show was done he stomped around the house some more. Oh he talked nicely to me but he'd disappear upstairs and then into the garage and then come out and announce that he fixed E's bike. Ladies, I had been asking him to fix that bike for weeks.
I tell you I cried like I hadn't in a really long time. Still when you tend to be a crier and well up over almost every argument, tears come across to him like no big deal. Why should he care that I was crying when I tend to tear up over most arguments anyways.
Like I said, it could have all been avoided. If I had just kept my mouth shut we would have been off to the beach. Better yet if I hadn't allowed myself to get annoyed way at the beginning and just called my mother, none of it would have happened.
I didn't really need to get into with him at that particular moment. I actually had been communicating some of my frustrations to him periodically throughout the week as conversations come up and as most of you know, it's better not to them over the head with it but give them something to ponder. Even so, it's still frustrating because while he listens, he never acknowledges the justness of my feelings or sometimes even he just laughs it off.
When I called my father that evening to talk to him about something else, I wasn't surprised when he told me that my mother had expected me to call that morning. Try and explain to your parents why you didn't bring their grandchildren out to see them because their mother was acting like a big baby.
It still bums me out. It's not like we can't go to the beach another day. It's just that I only generally take them when their dad's home and that's only on the weekends. Next weekend K and I are away and the summer is almost over. K is moving his video store in a couple of weeks so ventures to the beach are going to get pretty scarce. Every summer ends with a.... I wish we had done more things with the kids.
sigh.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Video Stores on the Verge of Extinction?
As most of you know, my husband and I own a video store. You may also recall that I owned another video store with my SIL which we sold last April. So I have, in effect, been in the movie business for the past 6 years.
Move Gallery has recently closed it's rental business and is now in the process of liquidating their stock. I am informed that Blockbuster is about to die as well and even that Roger's wouldn't be doing half so well if they didn't sell cell phones at their locations as well.
The demise of all these top video rental franchises has prompted a series of news reports all in which discuss the demise of the video rental store business. A news report aired today entitled "Why Would You Go to A Video Store?". The premise being why would you leave the comfort of your own home to travel the short distance to your local video store. (Okay some of you live in rural areas but a lot of you if not most live in urban areas). If we were all about convenience from the comfort of our homes then why don't we stay home and make our own coffee instead of going to Tim Horton's or Starbucks.
What these reports do not discuss is the cost of PPV and VOD. While we have been in a recession of the past year and a half, have they cut their costs? No way. Not only are their new release movies more expensive than a rental in my store, they also charge more if you want it in HD. Not to mention, they only offer the top new releases. While those of you in the US may benefit from companies like Netflix etc, those companies are not available to us in Canada and I can't imagine why you'd want to fill out your selection and then wait for titles to arrive in the mail. Maybe if I lived way out in the boonies, it would be convenient.
With rising gas costs it seems that everyone around us are raising their prices, from the pop guy to the candy man to the chip guy. However, if we raise our prices barely 25cents we'd have a mutiny on our hands. Change our programs or day specials a wee bit and literally customers have left slamming down their movies and walking out. They always think that there is a better deal down the road and some times there is but most often we feel we're pretty reasonable. We're not getting rich, we're supporting our family... barely.
Still the perception out there is that with VOD and PPV out there that it is only a matter of time before stores like mine are closing. Indeed at the pig roast this weekend, I was questioned by two different sets of people throughout the afternoon as to whether or not we could actually make a living running a video store. I thought this bordered on rudeness. After all, I wouldn't go up to any one in construction and ask how much money they made, whether they could support their family.
What people don't realize is that VOD, PPV, Netflix and downloads are only a small portion of the multibillion dollar industry. Even if their portion of the revenues added up to as much as 5%, it still leaves plenty of room for DVD sales and rentals for the rest of us. And believe me, they are not attracting more than 5% of the market at this point.
People also don't realize that the power behind things like VOD, PPV and Netflix are movie studios who want to cut out the middle man as much as possible. In fact, they are constantly discussing ideas like providing all new releases to Blockbuster and VOD 30 days before they allow the rest of us to rent them. By the time, I would be allowed to rent the movies, I might as well save my money. Why would they do that when Video Stores provide them with the biggest revenues even over and above what even Walmart generates? I just don't get it.
I am not completely naive. I realize that eventually we will get to the point where everything is done online and that even one day we won't even refer to it is as being online (it's not for nothing that I've watched 1984), it will just always be there. I just don't think it will be as fast as people say. If it was free, maybe but so long as we are having to pay to be online, pay for cable, pay to order movies, I think we have quite a few more years still. I think it's those who are really into ordering or downloading movies (often illegally) that spin up this whole hype thing that the mom and pops video stores are dying.
So why are places like Movie Gallery and Blockbuster suffering? One, they are publicly traded companies. Once you go public you have to pay presidents, vice presidents, CEOs, stockholders etc. It becomes extremely expensive for them to run. These companies are extremely top heavy and when trouble hits they aren't able to make the cuts necessary. Add to that that it is often difficult to keep stores running well when they are not owner run. Most successful business have their owners involved in the day to day business. I have seen more businesses go under because of an absent owner relying heavily on a manager who doesn't always have your best interests at heart. Think about it. How many times have you gone into one of these stores and been disappointed by the quality of service and the 3 or 4 giggling teenagers gossiping behind the counter who could care less about helping you. I'm not saying all stores are like that but many are.
Then they eliminated late fees. That was a huge mistake. Think about it, you tell your customers that it's okay to keep your movies out late, you won't be charged until 30 days go by and then they will charge your credit card the price of the movie. Okay. you keep your movie out for 29 days, take it back and all is forgiven. Tell me how much potential revenue did they just lose on that one movie that was unavailable for rent? Sure, BB and MG have tons of copies but only of the top new movies. So if they had 100 copies and you can bet they have an average of 2000 customers or more going through their store a week, what happens to the other 1900 customers who wanted to see the big new movie?
What it we were to go to the public library and take out as many books as we wanted and just kept them for as however long we wanted, no charge. The library would be empty.
Yet people constantly bitch at us about our high late fees (we charge $1.00 a day) and how MG was so much better. Yeah, and they went out of business. Then people like to make snide comments of how we make all our money off them being late and how we must just rake it in because they are so bad at returning movies. Um yeah, that's right. Would you like a tour through my mansion or even take a look at my $9.99 fake weddinng ring from Walmart because I can't afford to get my real ones sized, or how about that wonderful staycation we're taking this year. Don't even get me started on people who say they've returned movies when they actually didn't only they argue with you, swear at you and then 3 days later show up with the movie and no apology.
The point of this whole post is to make people aware that there is more to these companies going under than just a decline in rentals. Part of a successful business these days means you have to be diversified and we try to do that by bringing in movie related products and electronics for sale. It's true that if we want to stay afloat we need to turn our business into an "entertainment destination" rather than just a mere video rental store.
So if you're tempted to order PPV or VOD just remember that sometimes it's better to have spent the money upfront than to get a whopping big bill at the end of the month. Also, don't forget that the little video store around the corner is some guy or gal just trying to make a living. Cut them a break and give them a chance to get to know you by name. Going out to the local store becomes more than just an errand, it becomes an opportunity to socialize and you never know who you might run into.
What do you think? Do you VOD or PPV?
Move Gallery has recently closed it's rental business and is now in the process of liquidating their stock. I am informed that Blockbuster is about to die as well and even that Roger's wouldn't be doing half so well if they didn't sell cell phones at their locations as well.
The demise of all these top video rental franchises has prompted a series of news reports all in which discuss the demise of the video rental store business. A news report aired today entitled "Why Would You Go to A Video Store?". The premise being why would you leave the comfort of your own home to travel the short distance to your local video store. (Okay some of you live in rural areas but a lot of you if not most live in urban areas). If we were all about convenience from the comfort of our homes then why don't we stay home and make our own coffee instead of going to Tim Horton's or Starbucks.
What these reports do not discuss is the cost of PPV and VOD. While we have been in a recession of the past year and a half, have they cut their costs? No way. Not only are their new release movies more expensive than a rental in my store, they also charge more if you want it in HD. Not to mention, they only offer the top new releases. While those of you in the US may benefit from companies like Netflix etc, those companies are not available to us in Canada and I can't imagine why you'd want to fill out your selection and then wait for titles to arrive in the mail. Maybe if I lived way out in the boonies, it would be convenient.
With rising gas costs it seems that everyone around us are raising their prices, from the pop guy to the candy man to the chip guy. However, if we raise our prices barely 25cents we'd have a mutiny on our hands. Change our programs or day specials a wee bit and literally customers have left slamming down their movies and walking out. They always think that there is a better deal down the road and some times there is but most often we feel we're pretty reasonable. We're not getting rich, we're supporting our family... barely.
Still the perception out there is that with VOD and PPV out there that it is only a matter of time before stores like mine are closing. Indeed at the pig roast this weekend, I was questioned by two different sets of people throughout the afternoon as to whether or not we could actually make a living running a video store. I thought this bordered on rudeness. After all, I wouldn't go up to any one in construction and ask how much money they made, whether they could support their family.
What people don't realize is that VOD, PPV, Netflix and downloads are only a small portion of the multibillion dollar industry. Even if their portion of the revenues added up to as much as 5%, it still leaves plenty of room for DVD sales and rentals for the rest of us. And believe me, they are not attracting more than 5% of the market at this point.
People also don't realize that the power behind things like VOD, PPV and Netflix are movie studios who want to cut out the middle man as much as possible. In fact, they are constantly discussing ideas like providing all new releases to Blockbuster and VOD 30 days before they allow the rest of us to rent them. By the time, I would be allowed to rent the movies, I might as well save my money. Why would they do that when Video Stores provide them with the biggest revenues even over and above what even Walmart generates? I just don't get it.
I am not completely naive. I realize that eventually we will get to the point where everything is done online and that even one day we won't even refer to it is as being online (it's not for nothing that I've watched 1984), it will just always be there. I just don't think it will be as fast as people say. If it was free, maybe but so long as we are having to pay to be online, pay for cable, pay to order movies, I think we have quite a few more years still. I think it's those who are really into ordering or downloading movies (often illegally) that spin up this whole hype thing that the mom and pops video stores are dying.
So why are places like Movie Gallery and Blockbuster suffering? One, they are publicly traded companies. Once you go public you have to pay presidents, vice presidents, CEOs, stockholders etc. It becomes extremely expensive for them to run. These companies are extremely top heavy and when trouble hits they aren't able to make the cuts necessary. Add to that that it is often difficult to keep stores running well when they are not owner run. Most successful business have their owners involved in the day to day business. I have seen more businesses go under because of an absent owner relying heavily on a manager who doesn't always have your best interests at heart. Think about it. How many times have you gone into one of these stores and been disappointed by the quality of service and the 3 or 4 giggling teenagers gossiping behind the counter who could care less about helping you. I'm not saying all stores are like that but many are.
Then they eliminated late fees. That was a huge mistake. Think about it, you tell your customers that it's okay to keep your movies out late, you won't be charged until 30 days go by and then they will charge your credit card the price of the movie. Okay. you keep your movie out for 29 days, take it back and all is forgiven. Tell me how much potential revenue did they just lose on that one movie that was unavailable for rent? Sure, BB and MG have tons of copies but only of the top new movies. So if they had 100 copies and you can bet they have an average of 2000 customers or more going through their store a week, what happens to the other 1900 customers who wanted to see the big new movie?
What it we were to go to the public library and take out as many books as we wanted and just kept them for as however long we wanted, no charge. The library would be empty.
Yet people constantly bitch at us about our high late fees (we charge $1.00 a day) and how MG was so much better. Yeah, and they went out of business. Then people like to make snide comments of how we make all our money off them being late and how we must just rake it in because they are so bad at returning movies. Um yeah, that's right. Would you like a tour through my mansion or even take a look at my $9.99 fake weddinng ring from Walmart because I can't afford to get my real ones sized, or how about that wonderful staycation we're taking this year. Don't even get me started on people who say they've returned movies when they actually didn't only they argue with you, swear at you and then 3 days later show up with the movie and no apology.
The point of this whole post is to make people aware that there is more to these companies going under than just a decline in rentals. Part of a successful business these days means you have to be diversified and we try to do that by bringing in movie related products and electronics for sale. It's true that if we want to stay afloat we need to turn our business into an "entertainment destination" rather than just a mere video rental store.
So if you're tempted to order PPV or VOD just remember that sometimes it's better to have spent the money upfront than to get a whopping big bill at the end of the month. Also, don't forget that the little video store around the corner is some guy or gal just trying to make a living. Cut them a break and give them a chance to get to know you by name. Going out to the local store becomes more than just an errand, it becomes an opportunity to socialize and you never know who you might run into.
What do you think? Do you VOD or PPV?
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Recipe Tuesday - A Change
I know I haven't always been faithful to post up a recipe on Tuesday, a week often goes by that I do not think about it. While I often have many good intentions, I just as often find myself uninspired and have to fall back on the good old stand bys.
This week; however, I am bypassing Recipe Tuesday here in order to announce a little project I have started with my daughter E, and rather than referring to her as E all the time I decided to call her Emma.
That project being "Cooking With Emma"
In the interests of connecting more with my growing girl and in an attempt to find a fun way of encouraging her to read, I've decided to start a new blog documenting our cooking together. We are going to be pouring over the cookbooks looking for delicious things to try and my only rule is that we have to eat what we make. Which is easier said than done. ;)
So if you have a moment please check out my Cooking with Emma site.
This week; however, I am bypassing Recipe Tuesday here in order to announce a little project I have started with my daughter E, and rather than referring to her as E all the time I decided to call her Emma.
That project being "Cooking With Emma"
In the interests of connecting more with my growing girl and in an attempt to find a fun way of encouraging her to read, I've decided to start a new blog documenting our cooking together. We are going to be pouring over the cookbooks looking for delicious things to try and my only rule is that we have to eat what we make. Which is easier said than done. ;)
So if you have a moment please check out my Cooking with Emma site.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Lasagna in your Dishwasher?
Well, it's still sunny here on the west coast and what with shuffling the kids off to swimming lessons, laundry and hanging outside supervising the kids in the pool, I haven't had a whole lot of time to actually post lately.
However, here's a fun link that was sent to me this week. It's How to Cook Lasagna in your Dishwaser. Yup. In your dishwasher. There's a little video you can watch and while I may not go so far as to do this (not in the summer anyways), it definitely gave me a great tip on how to snazz up my lasagna skills a little.
So check it out at Cooking Lasagna in Your Dishwasher Video
And if any of you try this... let me know how it turned out.
However, here's a fun link that was sent to me this week. It's How to Cook Lasagna in your Dishwaser. Yup. In your dishwasher. There's a little video you can watch and while I may not go so far as to do this (not in the summer anyways), it definitely gave me a great tip on how to snazz up my lasagna skills a little.
So check it out at Cooking Lasagna in Your Dishwasher Video
And if any of you try this... let me know how it turned out.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Still feeling resentful
My husband and I recently shared our 11th wedding anniversary. Unfortunately, this year we had no funds and no babysitters so this day passed almost unnoticed by ourselves. I was too pooped from trying to manage everything to even desire to put any effort into even something small for him and he.. well he just didn't think about it. We never exchanged gifts in the past, choosing instead to put the money to going out to dinner or even away for the night once we had children. However, seeing as how we couldn't do anything this year, I would have appreciated even some flowers.
Some times I wonder if we are on that slippery slope towards... I don't know exactly what. I'm not talking divorce or separation but sometimes I just feel like we've lost our closeness, our desire to be with each other.
I don't think he sees it this way at all and I can only go by what I am feeling. It's just that sometimes I get so resentful of seemingly doing everything around here that I don't want to be close to him. I entertain thoughts of "why should I do something special for him when he can't even help with... I do everything else, why can't he surprise me for Valentines or Anniversary... ". You know what I'm saying? I struggle with this because I don't want to tear my heart away from him, I don't want to be grumpy or miserable with him yet... some times I just get so frustrated it's hard not to.
I used to think that we could resolve everything because we are such great communicators but 11 years of marriage has taught me that sometimes men just get tired of all our crap. They get tired of our sensitivity, our hormones, our desire to talk everything out. Add to the mix of working with a bunch of hormonal, overstrung women in the work place eight hours a day and my man just no longer has the patience or desire to even hear me out any more.
Also, when you have two different perspectives on the issues doesn't help either. I think I do everything, he thinks he helps out just fine. Which he does, on occasion. In his mind he is a regular helper, in my mind it's more like once a month kind of help. I've tried talking it out with him but it only gets his back up and I get the "you want me to work all the time and have no break" back from him, it's time to quit talking because he's just not getting it. All he hears is... "you never help, you do nothing, contribution is nothing". It doesn't matter how much I tell him that I am aware of what he does etc. So it's this bizarre circle that we just go around with. I get mad and become alternatively grumpy or silent and he shrugs and says "I'm not taking this on", which makes me even more mad or sad.
I sense the problem is more in my mind than his. I think he simply takes for granted all the things we do, he may know that I am not always happy but manlike, he also knows he can't fix it so that it is my problem. I am sure other than my occasional grumpiness, he's quite content. I would be too if someone made me dinner everyday, did my laundry, looked after the children etc, etc.
Every time I come across some mess that he's left for me, I have to remind myself of how he worked like crazy on the backyard to get it ready for E's birthday and how he mows the lawn and waters the flowers and the other things that he does do even if it is only occasionally.
I just wish I could stop feeling resentful about these things. Because after all, I am the one staying at home all day every day with the kids while he goes off to work. Since I've stopped working, it stands to reason that the bulk of the work falls on me. I can give myself a good lecture, shrug it off for a few days and get into a better frame of mind but then the next infraction brings it all back up again (like the soap dispenser or leaving his stupid dental picks all over the place).
We will get through it Marriage really is a complex thing. Just when you think you have it figured out, life changes and so does our expectations. The problem is learning to adjust our expectations into some sort of acceptable form. If that makes any sense.
I don't really feel like I have things down the way I had thought them out while bathing O this a.m. But the kids need me to take them to swimming lessons so I will just have to ponder this a little further.
Some times I wonder if we are on that slippery slope towards... I don't know exactly what. I'm not talking divorce or separation but sometimes I just feel like we've lost our closeness, our desire to be with each other.
I don't think he sees it this way at all and I can only go by what I am feeling. It's just that sometimes I get so resentful of seemingly doing everything around here that I don't want to be close to him. I entertain thoughts of "why should I do something special for him when he can't even help with... I do everything else, why can't he surprise me for Valentines or Anniversary... ". You know what I'm saying? I struggle with this because I don't want to tear my heart away from him, I don't want to be grumpy or miserable with him yet... some times I just get so frustrated it's hard not to.
I used to think that we could resolve everything because we are such great communicators but 11 years of marriage has taught me that sometimes men just get tired of all our crap. They get tired of our sensitivity, our hormones, our desire to talk everything out. Add to the mix of working with a bunch of hormonal, overstrung women in the work place eight hours a day and my man just no longer has the patience or desire to even hear me out any more.
Also, when you have two different perspectives on the issues doesn't help either. I think I do everything, he thinks he helps out just fine. Which he does, on occasion. In his mind he is a regular helper, in my mind it's more like once a month kind of help. I've tried talking it out with him but it only gets his back up and I get the "you want me to work all the time and have no break" back from him, it's time to quit talking because he's just not getting it. All he hears is... "you never help, you do nothing, contribution is nothing". It doesn't matter how much I tell him that I am aware of what he does etc. So it's this bizarre circle that we just go around with. I get mad and become alternatively grumpy or silent and he shrugs and says "I'm not taking this on", which makes me even more mad or sad.
I sense the problem is more in my mind than his. I think he simply takes for granted all the things we do, he may know that I am not always happy but manlike, he also knows he can't fix it so that it is my problem. I am sure other than my occasional grumpiness, he's quite content. I would be too if someone made me dinner everyday, did my laundry, looked after the children etc, etc.
Every time I come across some mess that he's left for me, I have to remind myself of how he worked like crazy on the backyard to get it ready for E's birthday and how he mows the lawn and waters the flowers and the other things that he does do even if it is only occasionally.
I just wish I could stop feeling resentful about these things. Because after all, I am the one staying at home all day every day with the kids while he goes off to work. Since I've stopped working, it stands to reason that the bulk of the work falls on me. I can give myself a good lecture, shrug it off for a few days and get into a better frame of mind but then the next infraction brings it all back up again (like the soap dispenser or leaving his stupid dental picks all over the place).
We will get through it Marriage really is a complex thing. Just when you think you have it figured out, life changes and so does our expectations. The problem is learning to adjust our expectations into some sort of acceptable form. If that makes any sense.
I don't really feel like I have things down the way I had thought them out while bathing O this a.m. But the kids need me to take them to swimming lessons so I will just have to ponder this a little further.
Monday, July 19, 2010
Oh No He Didn't - A Wifely Rant
So I am feeling like a much put upon wife these days. Between being busy and sick with a sore throat, hubby hasn't exactly been all that helpful around the house these days. As you can imagine, some days I stew on this a lot as I am forced to do something I had been waiting for him to do... like move the cabinets out of the front room that he bought at a garage sale over a week ago, haul the desk from the family room to the living room, pick up his drill, the drill battery and case off of my kitchen counter and *gasp* put it away.
Now I get that since I'm not working outside the home at the moment, a lot of the chores are expected to be done by me. No it wasn't an agreement.. it's just one of those silent if not reluctant understandings. Still, I expect him to take out the garbage and shift the heavy stuff. These days it doesn't seem to happen.
So the other day when he was in the bathroom, I just about snapped. You see he went to wash his hands and I guess the soap dispenser was out of soap. I heard him mutter .."... what's the point of having this if it's out of soap." OMG he so did not say that. That dispenser literally just ran out of soap. It's not like it's been out of soap for days and as far as I am concerned the implication was that I should have filled it. I was so mad I rushed in there, jabbering at him that I can't believe he just said that.. it takes like two minutes to fill it up... as I filled up the soap dispenser and all he said was it wasn't meant as a criticism of me. Oh yeah? Who was it a criticism of then, the soap fairy?
He then proceeded to explain that it's just frustrating to him to find things empty when he hardly washes his hand in that bathroom yada yada yada. But he wasn't criticizing me. Hubba what? Has he forgotten that he uses this bathroom daily to do his business since he can't stand sitting in any of the other bathrooms so that I can't even have a shower in peace if he decides he needs to do a number 2 at that precise moment. Yeah, and they say romance is dead.
This is not the only thing he finds empty around the house. He hates finding the sugar bowl almost empty and seems to think it's a conspiracy and only happens when he goes to make the tea. He fails to remember that 90% of the time I end up making the tea since apparently I just make it so much better. Yeah, it's called "things taste better when you sit on your ass and don't have to fetch it yourself". That's what it's really called.
I have to admit sometimes I leave things empty on purpose, like the kitchen soap dispenser just to see if he will actually fill it up. HE NEVER HAS. He gets the container out from under the sink and uses that until I actually take the extra two minutes to fill it up myself. Still it's aggravating trying to play these mind games with someone who doesn't have a clue.
Cause really it doesn't matter that I cleaned the bathrooms, washed the floors, did all the laundry AND put it away, cooked supper, tidied up the kids toys, dusted, washed and made beds, hauled the cabinets out to the garage, shifted the desk around.... those things all pass by unmentioned but I miss an empty soap dispenser...
well just take me out back and shoot me because obviously I have lost my usefulness around the house.
Now I get that since I'm not working outside the home at the moment, a lot of the chores are expected to be done by me. No it wasn't an agreement.. it's just one of those silent if not reluctant understandings. Still, I expect him to take out the garbage and shift the heavy stuff. These days it doesn't seem to happen.
So the other day when he was in the bathroom, I just about snapped. You see he went to wash his hands and I guess the soap dispenser was out of soap. I heard him mutter .."... what's the point of having this if it's out of soap." OMG he so did not say that. That dispenser literally just ran out of soap. It's not like it's been out of soap for days and as far as I am concerned the implication was that I should have filled it. I was so mad I rushed in there, jabbering at him that I can't believe he just said that.. it takes like two minutes to fill it up... as I filled up the soap dispenser and all he said was it wasn't meant as a criticism of me. Oh yeah? Who was it a criticism of then, the soap fairy?
He then proceeded to explain that it's just frustrating to him to find things empty when he hardly washes his hand in that bathroom yada yada yada. But he wasn't criticizing me. Hubba what? Has he forgotten that he uses this bathroom daily to do his business since he can't stand sitting in any of the other bathrooms so that I can't even have a shower in peace if he decides he needs to do a number 2 at that precise moment. Yeah, and they say romance is dead.
This is not the only thing he finds empty around the house. He hates finding the sugar bowl almost empty and seems to think it's a conspiracy and only happens when he goes to make the tea. He fails to remember that 90% of the time I end up making the tea since apparently I just make it so much better. Yeah, it's called "things taste better when you sit on your ass and don't have to fetch it yourself". That's what it's really called.
I have to admit sometimes I leave things empty on purpose, like the kitchen soap dispenser just to see if he will actually fill it up. HE NEVER HAS. He gets the container out from under the sink and uses that until I actually take the extra two minutes to fill it up myself. Still it's aggravating trying to play these mind games with someone who doesn't have a clue.
Cause really it doesn't matter that I cleaned the bathrooms, washed the floors, did all the laundry AND put it away, cooked supper, tidied up the kids toys, dusted, washed and made beds, hauled the cabinets out to the garage, shifted the desk around.... those things all pass by unmentioned but I miss an empty soap dispenser...
well just take me out back and shoot me because obviously I have lost my usefulness around the house.
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Kids Drive Me Crazy
Kids Drive me Crazy.
What kid law is out there that says the minute your mother gives up and decides to grant you your request to have your water baby back, making your sister take her own water baby instead, after you put up a big huff, rant, rave and all around meltdown about the fact that your sister was playing with your water baby (which your sister was admittedly taunting you with) that you sneak back after I leave and give your sister back your water baby. ?!?!?
This absolutely boggles my mind. You hear that... it's the sound of me banging my head agains the wall.
What kid law is out there that says the minute your mother gives up and decides to grant you your request to have your water baby back, making your sister take her own water baby instead, after you put up a big huff, rant, rave and all around meltdown about the fact that your sister was playing with your water baby (which your sister was admittedly taunting you with) that you sneak back after I leave and give your sister back your water baby. ?!?!?
This absolutely boggles my mind. You hear that... it's the sound of me banging my head agains the wall.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Kids make you smile
I wish I had a photo of this. O had used his dollar he "earned" from our garage sale selling lemonade to buy himself a cheapo watergun. I'll have to admit this water gun was cool because it had two barrels and a switch on the end to make the water spray in different directions.
So it was with great expectations that he took his water gun up to the beach to visit my folks. Nana obligingly filled it up for him but then he was disappointed when we all told him not to shoot water at us. (spoil sports I know). We then told him he could spray Papa's truck. Which he enthusiastically did unknowing that his dad switched the nozzle so that it'd spray in all directions including straight back at the person who is spraying it.
You cannot imagine the chuckles we all got out of it as my son would persist in spraying Papa's truck only every time to get sprayed in the face, which he would then startle back surprised, wipe his face and shoot again. Did he lower his water gun so it'd spray his shirt? No. Everytime it'd hit him straight in the face. This went on and on while we, the loving adults we are, howled. Really, who was the three year old in the bunch?
However, I was later able to see my son's mischievious side as I looked up to see him with his sister's, dorothy the dinosaur hat. This is a sturdy hat made out of denim. The little sneak was half ducked behind a log squirting his gun into her hat repeatedly and then I heard him say... "Here J" in a sing songy voice. Well, that cracked us all up again as we pondered the pure sneakiness of the trick he had ready for his sister. Unfortunately, his sister was busy playing in the sand and so was not interested in donning her hat.
It still makes me smile to think about it. Of course this is probably be one of those moments when you had to be there to fully appreciate the joke but at least it makes me laugh.
So it was with great expectations that he took his water gun up to the beach to visit my folks. Nana obligingly filled it up for him but then he was disappointed when we all told him not to shoot water at us. (spoil sports I know). We then told him he could spray Papa's truck. Which he enthusiastically did unknowing that his dad switched the nozzle so that it'd spray in all directions including straight back at the person who is spraying it.
You cannot imagine the chuckles we all got out of it as my son would persist in spraying Papa's truck only every time to get sprayed in the face, which he would then startle back surprised, wipe his face and shoot again. Did he lower his water gun so it'd spray his shirt? No. Everytime it'd hit him straight in the face. This went on and on while we, the loving adults we are, howled. Really, who was the three year old in the bunch?
However, I was later able to see my son's mischievious side as I looked up to see him with his sister's, dorothy the dinosaur hat. This is a sturdy hat made out of denim. The little sneak was half ducked behind a log squirting his gun into her hat repeatedly and then I heard him say... "Here J" in a sing songy voice. Well, that cracked us all up again as we pondered the pure sneakiness of the trick he had ready for his sister. Unfortunately, his sister was busy playing in the sand and so was not interested in donning her hat.
It still makes me smile to think about it. Of course this is probably be one of those moments when you had to be there to fully appreciate the joke but at least it makes me laugh.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
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